Yesterday was the Day of Silence. The students in our campus ministry helped to run a booth on the Quad to support our LGBT friends for this day of silent protest, remembrance, and reflection. I was asked to speak at the Break the Silence Rally at 5pm, also on the Quad at the University of Illinois. The following is the speech I delivered.
You might be wondering, “What is this guy doing here?” He doesn’t belong. Him being here is about as weird as Sarah Palin being the keynote speaker at the Democratic National Convention, Bill Maher attending Christmas Midnight Mass at St. Peter’s, or Paula Dean speaking at a conference on cardiac medicine.
I am here for 3 reasons recognizing the Day of Silence:
• As it states in Proverbs 31:8, to “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves.” There are incredible crimes, injustice, discrimination directed towards the LGBT community. We can do better.
• I am here to honor the memories of the victims of homophobia: 14-year old Lawrence King who was shot in a schoolyard for being gay. A young lesbian woman outside of San Francisco who was targeted, kidnapped, and raped repeatedly by a gang of teenage boys before being left for dead on the street. We remember Bobby Griffin who took his own life in August of 1983 due to alienation, never feeling normal or good enough to please his religious family. The list of tragedies goes on. We can do better.
• Finally, I recognize that we’ve seen progress, but there is more change that needs to take place. We can do better.
I’d like to share a story from the Bible. The Bible is a great book. Unfortunately, it has often been misused by selfish people justifying slavery, sexism, racism, our nation’s Manifest Destiny, and the slaughter and abuse of millions of Native Americans. If you’re not a Christian, please don’t tune out what I’m saying because these are still wise words we can live by. It is the story of the Good Samaritan. A Jewish man is leaving Jerusalem on the road to Jericho. Along the way, some bandits attack him, strip him of his clothing, and steal his belongings and money, leaving him for dead. Shortly after, a Levite and a priest walk by, displaying their indifference. They don’t just walk past him, they cross to the other side of the road, wanting nothing to do with him. Lastly, a Samaritan walks by who has compassion on the Jewish man and takes care of his needs. Ironically, they were sworn enemies based on religion and race. There was no earthly reason that this should have happened. Through this story, I see 3 types of people in our society.
Thieves – representing greedy, self-centered people. They gain at other people’s expense and don’t care who they hurt in the process. LGBT people have often been a target of violence and discrimination.
• 17% of all hate crimes are against LGBT people
• 75% of people committing hate crimes are under age 30 – 1/3 under 18
• possibly more than 80% of victims – never report the incident, often due to fear of being “outed”
The attacks have also been waged through the media. During the early 1980’s, AIDS was labeled as the gay cancer. People dismissed it as the punishment for an abberrant lifestyle. My friends in high school joked that GAY stood for Got AIDS Yet? 9/11 and Hurricane Katrina were declared to be God’s judgment against America for the sins of abortion and homosexuality. Matthew Shephard was a University of Wyoming college student who was targeted, beaten, and left for dead because he was gay. That in itself was a tragedy…but compounded by the protests of Fred Phelps and his family from Westboro, Kansas. On his website, he has a tribute to Matthew. That peaked my curiosity so I looked at. I was in horror as I saw Matthew’s face transposed over an animated flame. If you click the audio button, you can hear Matthew screaming from the pit of hell. There is a counter marking the number of days since Matthew went to hell. For a while, Phelps wanted to erect a tombstone in Matthew’s hometown showing his birthday, and “October 12, 1998 – entered into eternal damnation.” Yes, we can do better.
The Priest/Levite – are religious workers, public servants- people who should be responding to the needs of the people entrusted to them. This is the community where I’d have most influence for change: Among Evangelical Christians. The vast majority are either apathetic or looking out for their own needs; or full of accusation and void of compassion. If you wanna talk about a community with an “agenda,” I present to you the North American Church. They are all too quick to complain about their rights being violated but don’t hesitate to strip others of theirs. The Illinois Family Institute has waged an ad campaign against the Day of Silence through videos, literature, and blogs. “It is our firm opinion that these CLAIMS of discrimination, intolerance and bullying (aimed at people of faith who believe God’s Word that homosexuality is sin) are diverting attention away from GLSEN’s main purpose which has been and continues to be the normalization of homosexuality among impressionable youth.” Let’s discuss these claims.
One the EDUCATION front:
*97 % of LGBT students in high schools report regularly hearing homophobic remarks from their peers
*53% of LGBT students report homophobic comments by school
*80% of prospective teachers negative attitudes toward LGBT people
*2/3 of guidance counselors harbor negative feelings toward LGBT people
In their own homes:
*42% of homeless youth identify as gay/lesbian
*11.5% of LGBT youth report being physically attacked by family members
*45% of gay teens 20% of lesbian teens report experiencing harassment and/or physical violence
The results: Emotional Trauma and Scars
*30% of gay and bisexual adolescent males attempt suicide at least once
*LGBT teens 4x more likely to commit suicide, 30% of teen suicides are directly related to sexual identity
*83% of adolescent lesbians use alcohol, 56% use other drugs, and 11% use crack and/or cocaine
*68% of adolescent gay males use alcohol, 44% use other drugs
Locally at the University of Illinois as demonstrated in the 2004 Climate Report:
*9% reported being victims of harassment; 1/3 have witnessed discrimination/harassment
While lower than the national ave, even one is too much. Last April’s hate crime on Green Street was an illustration of that. We can do better.
Good Samaritan – He was the Israelite’s enemy but he laid differences aside and responded to the need. The #1 reason for me being here today? It is the ministry of Christ: caring for people, meeting needs, particularly marginalized, abused, overlooked and ignored portions of the population. That’s all I’ve tried to do. I’ve jumped off my high horse, looking for anyone who wants to connect…talk.
In his 2006 Global Initiatives Conference, President Clinton said “Too many have bought into the illusion that our differences matter more than our common humanity.” We don’t have to agree on everything. We can agree to disagree. That needs to be ok.
I see Curt McKay (former UI LGBT Director) in the audience. We’ve come a long way since the fall of 2006. I remember the first time we drove to the Rainbow Coffeehouse in the Etc. Café. As soon as I saw the rainbow flag, I panicked. For the first couple of weeks, we hid in the back, cowering. Sarah Clemons, a graduate intern was one of the first people to talk to us, support us, and help us build a bridge. We began working with Curt and Khristian, and now Leslie and Lyndon. Yes, we’ve come a long way since then and that’s why I’m standing here right now. I’ve met some amazing people and made some amazing friends.
Have we made progress? Yes. Do we have a long way to go, a lot to learn? YES. I haven’t arrived. I CAN DO BETTER. There are/will be disagreements, bumps in the road. And you know what? That’s what happens when friends get together. But this is my challenge to us all: let’s be courageous enough to take a risk. Get to know each other. Not Christians and LGBT. But as people. I remember a conversation I had with Sarah about certain outspoken evangelicals and their criticisms of gay people. Then she said, “Terry, thanks for taking the time to listen and figure out what kind of people we are.” My response was “Sarah, you’re not a kind of people. You’re people.”
I realize what I’m saying might be difficult to receive. My words for many are being filtered through adverse experiences: hatred, humiliation, shame, condemnation. But I also believe it’s possible. Kevin McGloughlin messaged me after the CRU/LGBT forum. My response to him was:
If LGBT folks can learn to forgive and forget the past, to move beyond the pain, give Christians another chance…
If Christians could actually practice Christ’s teachings instead of bowing to age old hatred and narrow mindedness, or using it for their own personal gain; if they’d stop trying to change people and realize we actually share the earth with 4 billion other people…
And if those walking the fine line between both communities would continue to speak up and demonstrate the benefits of building bridges vs. burning them…if all parties would be willing…then there’s hope.
Surely we can agree: violence, hatred, homophobia, ignorance, intolerance, discrimination needs to end NOW!
And to Mr. Phelps, this is my response: My God did an incredible thing in my life 25 years ago. I was a messed up teenager, feeling condemned, guilty, and absolutely helpless. He chose to forgive me…to love me. And to reiterate my colleague from the McKinley Foundation from 2 years ago: Please let me say…GOD LOVES YOU. Not only does God love you…We LOVE YOU. Several of our students are here. I don’t know everything that entails being an Ally. When I think of that word, I think of the U.S. and the Soviet Union during World War II. Look what happened after that. They can work together but often times that is on the surface level. I don’t minimize the Allies here at the U of I and their work. But we’re not here as ALLIES…we’re here as a FRIENDS…and WE’VE GOT YOUR BACK!
Please stop by our booth. We have some refreshments available. But we also have something else for you. There is an old American proverb that no one trace to the source, but it says “Before you judge a man walk a mile in his shoes.” This needs to be a practice in all of our lives. It’s so easy to assume things about a person through casual observations, but it’s not always accurate. We need to make an attempt to see life from other people’s points of view. As a token to remember this, we want to give you one of these SHOE keychains.
I want to close by reading the Prayer of St. Francis. I really admire this man’s life. He got into trouble for challenging the religious status quo, he broke ranks to do what he believed in, and he was passionate to be with the people he loved.
Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life. Amen.
Thank you and may the dialogue begin.
What a day! Let’s keep going. 
